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| Cat Two: "Tell me that's not a violin......" |
Cat Two's stress levels are, I'm pleased to report, starting to recede a little, his symptoms at last beginning to clear.
Little idea does he have of the things that are lying not too far around the corner.
Had he but the slightest clue, I'm sure he'd pack up his things (not that he has much in the stuff department, it's true) and go and seek his fortune elsewhere, a little like a real-life Puss-in-Boots, just minus the boots.
I'm thinking about one issue in particular, something that he is going to struggle with.
If it offers Cat Two the slightest consolation, he'll not be on his own.
You see, The W and I have been to take a look around the school that, it is hoped, The B will start next September, and The G 12 months after that.
It's rather nice.
It's got all the stuff that one tends to expect: a large hall for assemblies, cloakrooms, dining room, classrooms and a spacious playground.
The Headteacher seemed nice and said all the right things, although, If I'm honest, the lessons that we got to sit in on caused me one or two slight concerns.
I've always imagined myself helping The B&G with their homework, but even at this level - Primary, that is - I'm afraid I might be out of my depth.
One lesson was in something called phonics.
I'm sure I never did that at school.
Heck, I'm not even sure what it is.
Still, I have a little time to find out, I suppose, and anyway, it's not the biggest concern to arise from our visit. Far from it, in fact.
No, that came towards our tour's end, the proud Headteacher showing us a well-stocked music room, something I hadn't been expecting.
"Of course, we encourage the children to start learning an instrument as soon as possible," the Headteacher announced and, with that, she gave us all a knowing wink and looked purposely towards a large heap of violins, stacked in a corner, awaiting their next victims.
You know, if I close my eyes I can hear the screeching already.
I'm not going to tell Cat Two about this, because ignorance is bliss and, for now, he seems more content than he has done for quite some time.
But if he thinks he's stressed now. . . .
You are quite right sir ! There is nothing to match the torture of enduring a violin in the hands of a non-player.... Except perhaps for the dreaded recorder !!
ReplyDeleteThe woodwind equivalent of 'Waterboarding' !!!
Hmmmm well I would love to defend the violin, however I can see the point. I learnt at the age of eight, my mother banished me to the barbecue table in the backyard (ah the land of barbecues and huge gardens)
ReplyDeleteI did eventually get quite good at it, but yes, I think the waterboarding analogy works just as well with a misplayed string instrument. I think the cello sounds better played badly!